What will they say about me when I die?

I am lifting the following exercise from a recent post on Feminist Mormon Housewives. A new self-help book aiming to assist people of my generation to find their purpose in life provided the exercise. What follows are my answers:

Thought Experiment: You’ve died. You are at your own funeral. What do you want your friends and family to say about you? What did you do with your life? Write down five things you hope people say about the legacy that you’ve left. Write down five things you hope people say about your personality.

1. She was a seeker of truth and was open-minded, and respectful in the finding of it. She embraced the belief in the gospel that all good things come from God and that all truth can be circumscribed into one great whole. She would embrace truth, quite literally, wherever it could be found--in Islam, Unitarian Universalism, Paganism, Gnosticism, Physics, Astronomy and Chemistry. She was a student of life and found great joy in it.

2. She wanted to make a difference in the world and she worked diligently to address some of the injustices and inequalities that people, especially women throughout the world face. Her involvement in non-profit organizations and humanitarian works helped the lives of many. One of the things she was fond of saying was that she didn't want to make a difference in the life of a child, but she wanted to make a difference in the life of many. She worked at the systems level to address the root causes of poverty, abuse and barriers to living a full and happy life.

3. She prioritized her family while at the same time set the example to them to be anxiously engaged in a good cause (or in her case, many). Her children were involved with her and shared her with the people of the world. They had the opportunity to see and do many things that provided service to others because of the example and encouragement of their mother. She was actively involved with them at all levels of their lives and somehow found a balance in the limited hours of each day to show them they were loved and benefited from her presence and involvement in their lives.

4. She was a believer in the radical Jesus: the Jesus who was friends with the sinners and who was compassionate to their experiences, the socialist who believed in complete redistribution of wealth, the empowerment and equality of women and the Christ-like love that each person needs to achieve their potential.

5. She knew hardship, difficulty, pain and injustice and she was able to find strength from her experiences and turn them around to be compassionate towards others, to support and comfort them.

Core Values: Discover what drives you. What principles guide your actions and ideal self? Try to strip away all cultural conditioning and/or religious rhetoric and assess five core values by which you live your life and inform who you want to be. Write these down. Evaluate if there any disconnect between what you wrote down in step one and step two.

Maybe I already did this up above. Just pulling from there, we find that I value: openness to truth/goodness, compassion, advocacy, social justice and idealism.

Find Your Purpose: Why does what you are doing matter? What motivates and inspires you to keep following these values? Chose a purpose. It can be big or small, but has to be intentional. It is the reason for your goals and can change over time. If you are struggling to find your purpose try this experiment. Write down your five most valuable gifts and talents. Next, write below those what each of these can be used for. Finally, evaluate what types of careers or activities you would enjoy that would utilize some of these talents.

I'm already doing many of the things I hope to be remembered for so my purpose is described above. Involvement in Solace for Mothers, LDS WAVE, The Coalition for Improving Maternity Services already address some of those values that I hold so deeply. I would someday like to turn those desires and abilities into paid employment and I hope that it will be doing something that addresses the root causes of injustice in the world. I would love to work in humanitarian aid (whether it is at the local, national or global scene) but at the systems level. One of my skills is to look at big picture and see ways to build coalitions and to bring people together, to create ways that people from very different viewpoints can interface with each other in cooperative ways. Most of my efforts are somehow related to system building and connecting people in large communities to harness their combined power into a stronger more unified voice.

Test Your Purpose: Today my purpose will be _____________. To accomplish that I will use my gifts for ________________ to accomplish these specific goals_______________. Later change the timeline to week, month, and year.

Today my purpose will be two fold:
1) to connect with my children and show them the value of caring for others
2) learn about how to structure my family economically so we can be Equal Shared Parenting and Radical Homemaking folks.

To accomplish that I will use my gifts for being involved in national organizations and reading to accomplish these specific goals:
1) I will walk with my children in the March of Dimes walk, teach them to sew and make things we can sell on Talents of Sisters.
2) start reading the book Equally Shared Parenting and discuss with my husband the possibilities that our interests lead us to.


Otherwise, I would say that my goals are year long, or at the very least, seasonal. This year I hope to create an online community for birth advocates that can become a hub for the thousands who care birth issues in our world. This season, we hope to grow some of our own food and make some of our own household products to develop our skills and save money.

Write It All Down: Once you have a purpose you can stick with, write it all down and it will remind your of who you are and what you want to be. I.e.My five core values are ____________. My five core talents are ______________. In the next ten years my purpose will be ______________. The key features of my personal mission statement are ______________.

My five core values are openness to truth/goodness, compassion, advocacy, social justice and idealism.

My five core talents are:
1) building community and cooperation around advocacy efforts
2) addressing root causes of social issues
3) looking at the big picture
4) being respectful and open to differing view points
5) embracing and valuing the good that is inherent in differing perspectives

In the next ten years my purpose will be to:
1) achieve equal partnership in my marriage
2) find paid part-time employment in advocacy work
3) support and contribute to organizations addressing global poverty
4) continue to develop current advocacy organizations
5) educate my children through experiential learning in living the gospel of the radical Jesus.

The key features of my personal mission statement are make a difference in the world, aspire to the ideal, encourage potential, and value balance and compassion to oneself and others.

What I Wish I Heard: April 24th Happy Resurrection Day!

Sacrament Meeting:
What I heard: youth speaker defining faith as belief, not knowing. We can express our belief as in " I have faith in...."
What I wish I heard: that's all our testimonies need to be. We don't need to know. It's a cultural and not doctrinal proactive that comp ells us to say we know in testimony.

What I heard: faith is not knowing much about something but still believing anyway.
What I wish I heard: the trial of faith that comes is when learning a little more that can lead to questioning and thinking we know enough to reject our belief. But verily, faith is not having a perfect knowledge, which knowing can only come from having all information, the knowledge that only god possesses. Faith means that even in the light of new knowledge, we still believe and have hope that at some future point we will receive all knowledge, the kind that comes with all information, and the skill to see how it all works together.

What I heard: The resurrection is the most important day in the history of the world
What I wish I heard: without the atonement, the resurrection would be the saddest ebent in the history of the world. The atonement, then, is the most important even in the history of the world. Though like birthies argue, you could say that the creation of people was most important, or the fall from innocence in the garden of Eden. Or, let's just admit that hyperbole does a disservice in a church where people take things SO literally. 

What I heard: Gnosticism mentioned and the Gospel of Thomas quoted!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
what I wish I heard: choirs of angels singing pointing to everyone present that we can be more scholarly and broad in our studies. 

What I heard: BYU has an apocryphal literature class. I wish I had known about it when I was at BYU, even though I wasn't ready for it. Now that I am, BYU looks like a good place for Peter to work so can take the religion classes I would enjoy.

What I heard: parable of two paths. Choosing the right is the right choice.
What I wish I heard: doing a heart of darkness inversion in using the left as the right choice

Sunday school
What I heard: ah-men at the end of a prayer, rather than A-men

What I heard: a covenant is a non- negotiable contract ( from my husband) example is homeowner associations

What I heard: Abrahams father attempted to sacrifice him, then later Abraham was commanded to sacrifice his son.
What I wish I heard: how would that experience Abrahams view of his father? Could be find respect their for other religious views, find the good in his fathers commitment to his religious belief?

Relief Society:
What I heard: fundamentals of following the prophet
What I wish I heard: benson was an apostle at the time, it was originally given at a BYU devotional, and the people who quoted him were seventies. The fundamentals are not words of prophets, past or present.

What I heard: stories of people following the prophet in the scriptures, church history
What I wish I heard: stories of when the prophet was wrong; Elijah, Jonah, Joseph Smith

What I heard: the apostles are prophets too
What I wish I heard: but benson, who gave the fundamentals, defines prophet differently. He does not include the apostles in his definition of prophet. Now. 13 and 14 only include the president and his counselors.


What I wish i never heard: the prophet will never lead the church astray
What I wish I heard: kimball define what we meant by that statement. Will the prophet never make a mistake? Say the wrong thing? Speak without the Spirit? Never reject the gospel? Never break a commandment?

My Mormon.org Profile

Perhaps the highlight of my week, maybe month is that my Mormon.org profile was published complete with unorthodox and controversial content that I have been chastised for by some Mormons. Can I say that I'm feeling a little vindicated?

If Mormon.org was willing to publish it, and it was censored for being "false doctrine" then the Mormon doctrine police can quiet down, right?

Its not all controversy, though. I start out with a summary of my conversion story and answer questions about Why I'm Mormon and tell some personal stories. However the answers I'm most proud of and glad to see published on my profile are the following (These are the complete answers, so you'll have to click through to read my complete responses).

Why don't women hold the priesthood in the Mormon Church? How do women lead in the Mormon Church?

One of the reasons why women do not hold the priesthood in the Mormon Church is because, as President Hinckley said in an interview with an Australian reporter is that "there is no agitation for that." He seems to imply that if the members of the church were interested in women being ordained to the priesthood that a number of them ought to approach the leaders of the church expressing their interest. One faithful Mormon created a website where Mormons and non-Mormons can express their interest in women of the Mormon Church receiving the priesthood. The URL for that site is www.agitatingfaithfully.org. 

If the leaders take the communication seriously, they have the opportunity to show the world that the Mormon church continues to receive revelation and that the church can change its practices as it better learns the mind and will of God. It would be up to the prophet and apostles of the church to counsel and pray together on the topic of women receiving the priesthood. If they can all agree that God is telling them to extend the priesthood to women, they will share that revelation with the church and the world. 

It may be that God does have a reason for women not to receive that priesthood and Mormons do believe that God can reveal his reasons through the prophet. Certainly Mormons care to learn as much as they can through revelation and they care deeply about what truly is God's will. They want to know that it really is from God and not the popular response caused by the whim of the people. Until that time, Mormon women have many opportunities to serve within the church.

What do Mormons believe about the nature of God?

Mormons believe that God's nature is that of the perfect parent. One of the greatest doctrines taught by the LDS church is that we believe we are loved by a Father and Mother in Heaven. Together, they love us with perfect knowledge of what we need to lead us to truth. They are patient, gentle, kind but firm and fair. Heavenly Father is attentive to our prayers and sends the Spirit to guide and comfort us. He also sends his Spirit to others who will be guided to help and give us comfort in our struggles.

In knowing about the existence of a Heavenly Mother and a Heavenly Father, I have a better understanding of who I am as a daughter of God. Though not much is taught about Heavenly Mother, I envision a womanly goddess who is capable, strong, intelligent and all-knowing, creative, hardworking and infinitely loving: the perfect woman and mother and equal to power and ability to God the Father. The vision I have of Heavenly Father is gentle, loving, compassionate, all-knowing, patient and sensitive: the perfect man and father. In both, I find the parents I need to feel loved, comforted, guided and supported. I am able to learn how to be a better parent and partner to my husband because of the example I envision my heavenly parents set for me.

What I wish I heard at church April 17

Sacrament
What I heard: there is only one person in the world we know we can trust completely, that is God proverbs 3:4,
What I heard: cannot trust advertising, parents and prophets can be trusted
So glad I heard this message
What I wish I heard: that parents and prophets are fallible people, we can turn to god to know when to trust them

What I heard: no other god before me
What I wish I heard: a father who says, you shall have no other parent before me. Obviously that doesn't work. Heavenly mother and the father are one, both can be worshipped equally. When we pray to one, It is known to both. They love us and support each other in their role as parents. Quote the proclamation

Sunday School
What I heard: the tradition of baptism among the Jews is not known ( prior to John the baptist)
What I wish I heard; some Jewish scholar in the ward who knows and can expound on it. Where's Jared Anderson or Kevin Barney when I need him?

What I heard: revelation on how the church should operate cannot come from others who do not have the keys of the office whose duty it is to conduct church operations
What I wish I heard: non hierarchical revelation and how people of the church should feel welcome to make proposals and suggestions. When a priesthood holder is humble and loving, they will listen. Example: Joseph listened to Emma and we got the word of wisdom

Relief Society
What I heard: not judging the cause of a persons poverty and not judging what they do with charity given "what they do with the money is between them and god, what you do with the money is between you and god."
What I wish I heard: examples of this and a discussion of helping address causes of poverty and seeing true need rather than not looking for cause, difference between judging cause and addressing cause

What I Wish I Heard April 10 Testimony Meeting

What I wish I heard: someone bare testimony of heavenly mother. I felt prompted to bare testimony of heavenly mother, but time ran out. The feeling was so strong that I feel in order to act on it, I need to remember and act on it in the month of May. It was clear to me that the spirit was telling me that's what I am supposed to do.

Sunday school:
What I heard: a lesson on the priesthood
What I wish I heard: how women are affected when they are completely excluded from a lesson on the priesthood no mention in the manual at all.

What I heard: In the past the priesthood hasn't be extended to all the people it is currently extended to (used to be the tribe of Levi, then every worthy white male, now every worthy male). The Lord's requirements change over time. Left open the possibility that the requirements may change in the future.
What I wish I heard: mention that the priesthood is not currently extended to women but may be in the future. The priesthood has the responsibility to seek the will of god and make it happen. Would we know that god does not want women to have the priesthood if we never ask?

What I heard: a womans voice saying that the priesthood is the power of God to create
What I wish I heard her say: she believes womanhood receivers authority from God to create and bear young. That somehow women are or should be granted recognition that they too have the authority to act in Gods name.

What I heard: it hadn't always been that every worthy male receives the priesthood that's just how it is now.
What I wish I heard: that may be how it is now, and it can change in the future. Someday it may be conferred on women

<-------- and I said it. Later in the lesson
What I wish I had said: you can sign agitating faithfully to state you would like to see revelation sought on the matter


What I heard: it takes a sister to point out what the priesthood does
What I wish I heard: a discussion on why is that

What I heard: it's kind of a big thing to a young man to pass the sacrament
What I wish I heard: it's kind of a big thing that young women aren't allowed to pass the sacrament

What I heard: women do hold the priesthood when they marry a priesthood holder in the temple
What I wish I heard: some one point out that is false doctrine
What I wish I heard: women in some way participate in the priesthood before the sealing rite, they are participating in the priesthood in the endowment ( and initiatory as well ) it is not understood how that occurs since they are not ever ordained to the priesthood by priesthood holders ( and I said it)

What I heard: women are more spiritual and do not need the priesthood
What I wish I heard: men and women are not all that different, both can benefit from the duties of the priesthood and both can benefit from developing the qualities of perfect parenting

I like this lesson much more when it's a mixed group of male and females. This lesson sucks when it is just women in relief society.

Relief society:
What I heard: right off in a lesson on self-reliance: no one should feel bad that they need help during some times of their lives. Accepting church welfare is not shameful.

What I heard: self reliance should keep us from being dependent of others
What I wish I heard: interdependence among communities and self reliance fosters independence in communities

What I heard: emergency preparedness supplies can include birthing kits, diapers(save cloth) pamphlets on elimination communication, little potties, diva cups

What I heard: quote on emotional self reliance. Members should seek solutions for their emotional needs. Go to the church after our resources have been extinguished

What I heard: we are more capable than we think we are because we are children of god. We receive godlike power because we share traits of god.

What I heard: expecting help from others
What I wish I heard: sometimes the help doesn't come because it can't (I said it)

What I heard: you are wrong for saying that people aren't helping when you need
What I wish I heard: I'm sorry that was your experience

What I wish I heard: Conference edition

Its Conference weekend and good news! There is less that I wish I heard in Conference than in a regular church meeting. That's a good sign, right?

Saturday April 2

Morning Session:
What I heard: Primary President describes children in the terms of the scriptures, meek, submissive. Adults should follow their example
What I wish I heard: acknowledgment that children are not inherently submissive. Most (if not all) children do not fit that description most of the time. We don't really want to follow the example of our children because then we would be completely egotistical and protecting of what we believe is ours.

What I heard: a Latin American speaker's accented English
What I wish I heard: the Latin American's home language, translated into English for English speakers like the English is translated into so many languages throughout the world.

What I heard: Quentin L. Cook said do not judge women who work
What I wish I heard: it is good for women who want to work outside of the home to do so and then praise them for their and their husband’s ability to provide and nurture their children. At this point in time, our society is not structured to support this equal sharing of child care and work responsibilities. Families are working to find solutions that work for them, provide for their family's needs and do not marginalize the talents and abilities of either mother or father.

Statistical report:
What I heard: humanitarian report
What I wish I heard: the total amount given in fast offerings to local communities throughout the world in the last year. Last year, the Ensign reported that the church has given $1 billion in humanitarian relief in the last 2 decades but they did not report any estimates of fast offerings that did not go to world wide efforts but stayed in local units. That amount will likely be staggering.

Sunday morning:
What I heard: Presiding Bishop described the origins of the Welfare program and prophet's statements of prioritizing humanitarian efforts in front of temples, etc if needed.
What I wish I heard: The church is trying to find new ways to increase the amount of aid that goes out to the world. All the profits from the Salt Lake downtown revitalization project will go to humanitarian efforts throughout the world.

What I loved hearing! It is our duty to do what we can to make the world a better place.

What I heard: President Monson said If you have a temple nearby, go to the temple more often.
What I wish I heard: It can be hard for parents of young children to go to the temple frequently. Grandparents, help your adult children go by babysitting. Ward members, young men and women, help young families go.

Sunday afternoon:
What I loved hearing! Elder Christoffersen counseling us to take criticism/ feedback in a positive way. If we do not, the person who loves us enough to correct us will stop offering that feedback and progression is halted. Begin to self-correct.

What I heard: A Seventy said pay tithing even when there is a concern about having enough and your lack will be made up to you.
What I wish I heard: Sometimes the lack in not made up and...this is a good case where inspired wisdom from the Lord's anointed.
Also what I wish I heard: Mormons don't have the monopoly on tithing. Moral secularism is riding the tithing train now too, encouraging every person throughout the world to give a portion of their income to alleviating poverty and making the world a better place (www.thelifeyoucansave.org). The church will soon begin having to defend itself that they aren't giving enough to humanitarian efforts.

What I heard: C. Scott Grow
What I thought: teeheehee

What I loved hearing: Seventy said to do identify a child's behavior as a characteristic of that child's identity.

What I loved hearing : Holland saying "little bedlamites." The littles are a new name.

What I heard: A very slow, soothing, sleep inducing rendition of "More Holiness Give Me."
What I wish I heard: something stirring and that doesn't take up more time than the prophet was given to speak. Most people I know don't do too well after sitting for hours, so close to the end listening to something so long. As least they're not running over time. This time.

What I wish I heard in church on Sunday

This is likely going to become a new series. Every Sunday I sit in church and listen to the lessons and talks that at a surface level are good but I often find myself thinking "if only they went deeper" or "I wish they went further and said this..." I decided that my thoughts were worthwhile and though I may not be able to hear those talks at church or discuss them with my family members and friends, that I could take notes, and create those talks and lessons in mind.

In fact, I think I remember hearing I think President Eyring say that his father did something like this. I'm taking it a step further by writing down my thoughts while I'm at church and then coming home and posting them on my blog. I hope to have conversations about this with my readers, friends and peers and create the kind of church meetings that would be more uplifting for me personally, though the way they are at church may be exactly what most others need for themselves.
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So here you go, my first installment of "What I wish I hear in church on Sunday..."

Sacrament meeting
What was said: give relief to japan, donate money because we can't be there to help

What I wish I heard: Oftentimes when aid is needed, extra volunteers can be a burden, accommodations cannot be found for them, their community has the man power. Their number one need is money to obtain the supplies they need to rebuild, provide for their needs. Giving money is the best way we can help in most aid situations. It is also the most scarce In our lives. An LDS woman in Idaho had a great idea to raise money in an effective way that offers good and services that people need and are seeking and then directs the profits to aid organizations. Talents of Sisters collects crafts from hobbyists and sells the products on etsy to people who are seeking out those goods. Crafters can donate their goods and so the whole amount goes to humanitarian fundraising or pledge a portion of their profit. A strength of talents of sisters is customers come from everyone and are not limited to certain demographics. So next time you are looking for a one of a kind gift, look on Talents of Sisters. And next time you feel like crafting and don't have a way to gift that craft, list it on Talents of Sisters and turn your hobby into relief.

What was said: people who are suffering want people to listen and understand, validate their suffering not judge

What I wish I heard: This is not a skill that many of us have. It is a terrible feeling to feel alone in your suffering. Often it is uncomfortable for people to hear of others tales of woe and they choose to focus on staying busy and doing in Service rather than providing the most needed service which is listening and providing relief to emotional anguish. Thank goodness for Christ and his perfect understanding of our suffering that we are never really alone. As instruments in the hands of God, we can provide that physical and emotional companionship to others like he provides to us.

We need community. I would like to see church members familiarize themselves with research on the necessity of community, how it ensures our survival and our health. They would see that the church provides this community in inspired ways. However, members of the church have a few things to learn when it comes to creating that community of support and relief.

What was said: talk on learning and truth, academic learning should be sought after in all areas of learning (excellent!)

What I wish I heard: discuss the limits of this- examples of learning that goes from studying very different forms of thought "embracing truth wherever it can be found" learning that comes from studying other religions

What was said: Prophet gives revelation at conference

What I wish I heard: There hasn't been a revealed revelation since 1976. Revelations are not common in the church (even the Proclamation is not revelation!) and it is a disservice to say that everything that comes out of conference is revelation. The hymn testimony says it best "I know a prophet speaks to us for our eternal gain." They may speak with inspiration at conference but conference is not revelation unless something is specifically stated as revelation.

Sunday school
What was said: Jesus is sinless

What I wish I heard: Jesus did not have to be sinless to be the savior of the world. Everyone has imperfections, even the lamb without blemish is not going to be perfect in every way to the cellular level. I do not feel the need to believe that Christ was perfect without sin to still believe, love and appreciate his atonement. A more human Jesus still makes the infinite and eternal atonement possible for everyone.

It doesn't matter all that much to me one way or the other and it doesn't upset me when I hear how adamantly most Mormons believe that Jesus literally lived without sinning. I would however love to hear a strong analysis on both sides of why/why not his sinless state was necessary for the atonement to be carried out. Raising the possibility that he was not without sin (but was capable of repenting and learning from his mistakes) would likely cause all sorts of havoc with people's testimonies. I, for one, would not find it challenging to my faith. At a higher level than that, I don't "know" in the testimony sense of knowing that Christ was sinless. I guess I better study and pray about it.


Relief society

What I heard: a woman's voice "as a young elder..." as she read a first hand account written by a man (and the uncomfortable titter of the other women present)

What I wish I heard: Someone go off on how ridiculous it is that women are denied the priesthood based on their gender. That person is not going to be me, but how refreshing it would be if we could stop avoiding the white elephant in the room that women, if they were to be honest with themselves, are uncomfortable with authority being given to men only. If women could be honest, would they say they think women should have the priesthood?. The priesthood doesn't have to be male. Leaders of the church can receive revelation to grant priesthood to women. Fast for that revelation, pray for it. In fact, today was the day at FMH was publicizing a communal fast on the topic of women receiving the priesthood in hopes that church leadership will "ask of God." (James 1:5)

Random Pondering:
I think it would be cool if the church were to experiment with a mega church in an area like Seattle. How many people would be in the congregation? If there are about 300 people attending each ward on Sunday, and there are 5 stakes, that is about 1500 people at church on Sunday. Would reactivation efforts be more affective with more people free from leadership? Would our communities be stronger?

What I heard: citation from Elder Oaks talk from oct 2010 conference: revelation both personal and through authority

What I wish I heard: bring up the legitmate concerns of when the person in authority is wrong, or when someones' personal revelation conflicts with priesthood direction


Concept I like: Spirit through osmosis soaking it up when surrounded by people who possess the spirit, a good essence that strengthens those near by

What I heard: The Holy Ghost is male

What I wish I heard: We don't actually know that the holy ghost is a man. Could be a woman (see Fall 2010 Exponent), could be a group of people. Does it matter? It would be nice to know but it doesn't change that the Spirit is real and good and present in the LDS church and throughout peoples of the world. It just bugs me that people speak with such certainty that the spirit is male when they don't actually know and the prophets/apostles who spoke with such certainty didn't actually know either.


What I heard: visiting teachers and home teachers are there for us when we need them.

What I wish I heard: Most visiting teachers and home teachers are not there for us the way that would be most beneficial to us. We could call learn more about providing emotional support.


Left-overs from church last week:

What I heard: Thinking of work as service: imbuing spirit and love into work done for others, laundry, dishes, food

What I wish I heard: We can also look at our employment and the men of the church can look at their paid employment: how does your work help and serve other? Is it meaningful service? If you do not like the answer to that question, is it important to be engaged in paid work that does help others? Do we have a responsibility to people outside of your family so much that we serve others and our families simultaneously in our paid employment? Are our priorities in paid employment focused on how our work efforts serve others?

Alright, let's discuss.

And please remember, its fine to disagree with me and point out inaccuracies or to suggest references that might give me additional insights. Just do it respectively and without attacking me. I haven't had that problem yet among my readers (thank you!) but you know, gotta add the obligatory, lets act like respectful Christians...